I've been to Atlantic City several times for work now, and I find it less and less appealing every time. Something about smoky casinos and degenerate gamblers...in New Jersey...just doesn't really do it for me. I decided to invite my friend Marggee to partake in my all-expenses paid holiday weekend. Normally on trips like this, my boss would just drive me to wherever we were going, but because Marggee and I were trying to make a long weekend out of this rather than just arrive in time for the show, we investigated the many different modes of transportation that would get us there. The most attractive option was the relatively new ACES Train, which is essentially a speed shuttle between New York and Atlantic City. The problem we ran into is that it has a very limited schedule and runs only on the weekend - not accounting for a holiday Monday. The ACES Train was unfortunately out.
So we decided to rough it and check out the bus options. After checking rates between several different bus companies, we found the cheapest and quickest round trip service to be on Megabus. The bus left out of a totally disgusting Port Authority terminal at 8:30pm, which meant we had plenty of time to get there after work. The ride took only a little over 2 hours and cost only $36 (although my travel could be expensed, Marggee's couldn't, so the price was a consideration). We had a winner. Because neither of us had ever taken public transportation to a casino mecca, there was no way we could have known the unbelievably low caliber of clientele this bus would attract. We were two of the only people on the bus who actually had overnight bags packed; these were people going to gamble all night without having to pay for a hotel room. Fortunately, we did not have to interact with these heathens at any point, so we took the very front seats on the bus, connected to the complimentary Megabus WiFi and entertained ourselves by watching Julie and Julia on Netflix.
The drop-off location for the bus was Caesar's Palace, which is right in the middle of the main section of casinos, but nowhere near our relatively remote destination, The Borgata, which is separated from the general hubbub and mayhem of "downtown" Atlantic City (and for that reason seems to attract a slightly higher caliber of riff-raff). We were greeted when we stepped off the bus with a $20 voucher good for the slot machines inside Caesar's. Now if that doesn't make enduring the Port Authority bus terminal worth it, I don't know what would! This effectively made our transportation feel as though it cost next to nothing, plus we would get to do a little gambling for free - since neither of us would have actually spent our own money to gamble! We put a trip back to the Caesar's slots on the top of our to-do list for Sunday when we would have an entire day to kill.
We got checked in (VIP concierge, thank you) at the Borgata and immediately went in search of the employee cafeteria, for which we had all access passes and planned to eat as many meals as possible in. Calling it an "employee cafeteria" really doesn't conjure up the right image, I don't think, because this was more akin to a delicious buffet of home-cooked food. Everything was amazing, and we gorged for an hour next to cocktail waitresses and pit bosses who probably thought we had somehow snuck in to their hidden food wonderland. My favorite thing I ate in the cafeteria was the baked tilapia, and I would hit the tilapia section up several more times over the course of the weekend! The entire menu was rotating though, so there were always new things to try. My boss thought we were crazy and teased us about eating the cafeteria food when I could be expensing meals in the nice restaurants in the casino, but I don't think I could have eaten anything I would have enjoyed more, quite frankly. Sausage and hashbrowns and pancakes for breakfast and lots of fresh fish and meat and veggies for lunch and dinner...every time Marggee and I sat down with our overflowing plates of food, we would just laugh at each other and say things like "I am so happy right now." HA! Poor, malnourished New Yorkers.
Saturday I pretty much had to work all day setting up the show, so although I told Marggee to go to the spa or do something fun (or sleep), she ended up staying by my side most of the day helping out with the minutiae of producing a major comedy show. This was very helpful, since in the past when I've done this, I had always had a helper, but she no longer works for the company, so now it is just me flying solo. We had two sold out shows on Saturday night and a final sold out show on Sunday night in the Event Center which all ran smoothly.
I felt bad not being able to go play with Marggee all day on Saturday and basically having her stuck with me working, so on Sunday, we decided to take the shuttle to The Walk, Atlantic City's vast outlet center. The shuttle picked us up right in front of the Borgata and took us on a 15-minute ride that cost less than $2 to the outlets. There were hundreds of stores (we probably made it to 10 of them) and some great deals. Even though I'm not much of a shopper, even I couldn't resist some of the cute clothes I found at some seriously discounted prices!
From the outlet center, we made the short walk over to Caesar's Palace to redeem our $20 slot vouchers. Of course, to redeem them we had to provide all sorts of information, so I'm pretty sure I will be getting junk mail for free rooms and buffets at Caesar's from now until eternity. We blew through the $20 relatively quickly (although Marggee had a stroke of luck that only prolonged the inevitable). Because Marggee had never been to AC, I took her out the back entrance of the casino so we could walk down the boardwalk a little ways, which is personally my favorite part of this abysmal town. After wandering around aimlessly for about 20 minutes, we finally figured out where the shuttle would pick us back up and headed back to the Borgata to scarf down another cafeteria meal and get ready for the final show.
The Atlantic City Boardwalk:
After the show on Sunday, we went with the promoter and all the other people involved with the show to the little swanky bar in the middle of the casino. It was so incredibly smoky (and I was wearing some new outlet clothes!) so I couldn't wait to get out of there and get to sleep. Not to mention, the smoke was starting to bring on either some kind of allergic reaction, or was just making me physically sick. So with that, we hit the sack. The next morning, one of the comic's publicists was taking a limo back into New York that the casino had provided for her (long story), so although our bus tickets were round trip, we quickly ditched them and hopped in the limo bright and early. We all slept the entire way back, and I'm pretty sure we all crawled into bed and slept the rest of the day and night.
I enjoyed this trip to Atlantic City a lot...although I didn't get to go out on the beach as I have in the past, it was fun to have a friend around, and going shopping and gambling away free money was a nice reprieve from the usual monotony of work trips to this otherwise dreadful place. Next up: Foxwoods Resort Casino in Connecticut!
"Put your makeup on, fix your hair up pretty
And meet me tonight in Atlantic City..." - Atlantic City, Bruce Springsteen
Miles Traveled Today: 254
Total Miles Traveled: 13,975
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